Balance and Prophets

I haven't blogged all week. I missed it! I have to admit that I am very happy just to be writing another post.

I've been working this week on finding the right balance. Life changes now and then, throwing new things at you or taking other things away. And I have to adjust and shift things around to find a new balance. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this particular balance. Maybe a little more tweaking, but it's looking and feeling good so far.

My mind has also been occupied by thoughts of this weekend. My parents are coming to visit. I am so excited to see them! And I get to listen to a prophet's words. The 179th Semiannual General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints will be held tomorrow and Sunday, Oct. 3-4. I am so grateful for a modern day prophet to give us counsel and guidance from the Lord!

President Thomas S. Monson

Who Am I?

For today's Wordfull Wednesday we are supposed to describe who we are and even include a picture of ourselves. Visit Chocolate on My Cranium for more Wordfull Wednesday participants.

Cocoa said this would be hard. She was right.

As I started thinking about who I am and what I wanted to write about myself I immediately thought of some of my less desirable characteristics. I am easily distracted, I procrastinate, I'm not very organized. Things like that. I quickly stopped myself. Cocoa also said that we should show our beauty. What is there about me that is beautiful? I had to think.

I am almost 31 and am more comfortable with myself than I think I ever have been. It's a nice feeling to be happy being myself. I'm not always thrilled with myself. Sometimes I do things right and sometimes I don't.

And yet I would not be the person I am now without the person I was last year, or 5 or 10 or 20 years ago. So I am going to share lots of pictures of me. All kinds of different me's that add up to the me I am now.

Me at age 1.

I was the first child born to my wonderful parents. My mom (and my grandma and a couple of aunts) made most of my clothes when I was little. My mom taught me how to sew when I was old enough. I love to sew! I'm still learning a lot, but I very much enjoy it.

I very quickly gained two brothers. This picture was taken the day my brother Sam was blessed. I was 3 and my brother Ben was just about 18 months old. I did finally get two sisters. Heidi is 6 and a half years younger than me. (I remember jumping up and down when I learned I had a sister.) And Dixie is almost 11 years younger than me.

This picture of my family was taken at our family reunion this summer. It was SO wonderful to be with all of them. Oh, I love them!

I was a pretty quiet kid. I sang to myself a lot. And daydreamed a lot. I still do when I have a quiet moment. I also grew up with a large strawberry patch and a few lilac bushes in the yard. Those were some of my favorite places to sit and imagine. Strawberries and lilacs are still two of my very favorite things.

I got to go with my Dad on a trip to Seattle when I was 14. He took this picture of me in our hotel room. We had great conversations on that trip, and a few others I was able to go on with him. I still love talking to my Dad. And I love maps, traveling, and exploring new places.

I graduated from high school in 1997. Though I would never want to go back to high school, it was a great growing experience for me. Right after my freshman year of high school I moved from a small town in Idaho to Denver and a much larger high school. I spent more time with my brothers and came to depend on them quite a bit. I had to really decide what I believed and had to stand up for it. I landed the lead role in the school musical when I was a Jr. and gained a lot of self confidence from that and many other experiences. Now I am able to lead singing time for the Primary kids at church every Sunday and it isn't scary to me. I also met the boy who would one day be my husband. In fact we hung out quite a bit and dated off and on.

This is us when I was a senior and he was getting ready to leave on his mission. (I know it looks like an engagement picture, but it really wasn't.) I didn't tell him that I would wait for him. And I didn't. I wrote him a "Dear John" after he had been gone for 1 year. I did, however, realize my mistake. I broke up with the other guy and wrote back to James a couple of months before he came home. I learned a lot then. I came to appreciate James so much more than I had before. I realized that he really did have the qualities I wanted in a husband. Now I know that he has even more wonderful qualities that I didn't even think about at the time.

This is me as a new mother at age 21. I am so glad I'm not a new mother any more. I'm still learning a lot about being a mom, and there are lots of new things coming. But I do love being a mom. It has taught me and changed me more than any other experience I've had.

This is me reeling in a salmon in Puget Sound this summer. Yes, it was cold that day! James and I went to Whidbey Island for a few days to celebrate our 10th anniversary. As we were talking about what we would like to do on our little getaway James said that he would really like to go salmon fishing. He loves fishing. I don't mind fishing so much, but I am terrified of water and get pretty nervous out in a boat. James asked me if I would be ok with salmon fishing and I told him that "without kids, I can handle it." I really wanted to explore some of the little towns on the island and do some window shopping. James really does not like shopping. I asked if he would be too bored with that. He said, "Without kids, I can handle it."

So we went fishing and I really enjoyed it. I even caught the first fish! I'm learning that some things might not be as scary as I had thought.

And so this is me now at age 30. I wonder who I will be after the next 30 years. I'm excited to find out.

Childhood Memories

While staying at my parents house this last month, I was able to read some of my favorite stories to my own children. My mom still has them and keeps them in the room where my kids slept. My kids loved them just like I did. I used to go to sleep with stacks of books tucked around me and it made me smile to see my little ones falling asleep with the very same books tucked around them. These are just some of them.

I also got to show my children the tiny bedroom I used to share with my two brothers and one sister. It is now my Mom's sewing/crafting room. It is funny to go into that room now. I should explain that my family moved out of that house when I was 8, but my parents moved back into it about 2 years ago. When I go into that old bedroom of mine I really wonder how we all fit into it. I'm just guessing here (maybe you can help me out, Mom) but I think that room is about 6' x 8' with a wardrobe built into one end. I remember thinking the window and wardrobe and my bunk bed were so big when really they were not. I guess that's how my kids see them now.

It was so wonderful having that time with my parents this summer. It brought back lots of great memories for me and made some special memories for my children. It was perfect.

Star Gazing with My Dad

image from Great Images In Nasa

Tonight I got to sit and watch the stars with my Dad. That was something I loved doing as a kid. We star gazed when we went camping, when we were driving at night, or when we happened to be outside on a pleasant summer night just like tonight. This time we enjoyed the Milky Way and watching for satellites and shooting stars. The satellites were a bit disappointing. We saw probably 6 of them be they were all so faint that we would lose sight of them if we looked directly at them. Do you know that trick? Try looking just to the side of a star or satellite and then look directly at it. It's an amazing difference. Tonight Dad and I did see quite a few shooting stars. Probably 12-15 all in about an hour. Some of them even left a visible trail of smoke. I don't think I've ever seen that before.

My Dad and I love to talk to each other. We can talk for hours and hours on topics heavy or light. It is so wonderful. Star gazing always gets us going. We had a very nice visit tonight. I learned things from him and about him. He told me that he used to watch for satellites with his dad and what great times those were for him. I don't think I knew that. He showed me again how to find the Little Dipper and the North Star. And as always I came away from our time together feeling loved, uplifted, and very grateful to have the dad I have. Thanks, Dad. I love you.

Affection

I decided to write wordfull wednesday here on my new blog. For other wordfull wednesday participants visit Chocolat On My Cranium.

One summer when I was a teenager my family went to visit my grandparents. I slept on a cot just outside the room where my parents were sleeping. I was not trying to eavesdrop, but I couldn't help but hear them say to each other, "I love you" just before turning out the light. They did this every night. I always knew that my parents loved each other. They have never been afraid to show their love for each other in front of their children. What a comfort it was to me as a child to know that my Dad loved my Mom (and she loved him) so much that he would kiss her and call her beautiful when he left or came home, or even when she just walked into the room. They were that way with us kids as well. We always got a kiss and a hug when we left for school. My parents were so good at showing me they loved me that I never had a chance to doubt it. They listened when I talked, even if it sometimes took a long time for me to say everything. Now that I am a parent myself I realize that this had to be a little difficult at times. But they did it. I try to follow their wonderful example of showing their love and affection. I hope that those I love know that I do, for it is very, very much.